Living with ghosts

I'm not sure if this is quite the same thing, but I definitely tend to miss being lonely, too. I desperately want to be with people when I am lonely and I miss my alone time as well as my identity AS a lonely person (and a person who hopelessly longs for things) when I'm around people all the time and sort of complacently happy. I've always attributed that to my 12th house Sun/Venus, but perhaps those placements are not the only culprits. Missing feeling some amount of angst certainly sounds Scorpionic, at any rate.

To work with these things productively, I'm trying to focus on emphasizing finding the positive emotional intensity in areas I'm happy with (like my work/girlfriend/friends) and to channel my need for solitude and negative (or at least upsetting or pleasantly lonely/melancholic/pining) emotional intensity into creativity. I need to actually force myself to take some alone time (I forget I need it and then start feeling antsy), and when I do it tends to be pretty enchanting and creatively inspiring. So I'm hoping I can bring my need for emotional upheaval into the creative realm and have it inspire me to start working again instead of actualizing it elsewhere inappropriately (say, in my relationship with my girlfriend).

Spot on, Mem.
And then one may get attached even to the discomfort of (constantly) having to choose between the 'terrible void' and the person in all their 'objective existence'.